The World is Funneh Place

Published on Tuesday, March 9, 2010 at 8am

So funny that it warrants the misspelling of such a simple word.

Here are three lessons that I learned yesterday and this morning

LESSON #1:Never complain about a bad day; fate will bitch slap you, throw you in a corner, and continue to kick the crap out of you mercilessly:
Yesterday started off pretty great. Even work didn't start off badly. Then out of nowhere, I got that feeling I get that can mess up any good. That self-deprecating feeling that rattles your bones and makes everything seem use less and futile. I mentioned that today just worse. I should have shut up.
Major instance one: When closing, I have to mop. Well I started to mop and then the bucket of water fell over. Water was everywhere in the kitchen, I ended up mopping the WHOLE DAMN KITCHEN. It took a little over 20 minutes, we were busy out in the front so I had to power mop. When I was done, some one spilled one of the containers of tea. He was too busy to clean it, so I had to mop again
Major Instance two: Driving home from work, I sneezed. It created a nose bleed. I continued sneezing and blood was everywhere, all over the windows, steering wheel, and myself. It was bad, blood was running down my face getting everywhere. I searched for a napkin. I swerved a bit and an officer decided to pull me over. And wouldn't you know it, one of the three cops I do not know was the officer. I rolled down my window and asked what was the problem. He asked me to step out. He frisked me and called in backup. I asked what he was looking for and he said "cocaine". My eyes were red from eating spicy food and the nose bleed was still profuse. I tried telling him what happened. He had none of that. Then my stomach acted up (sometimes I throw up after eating). I hurled all over the ground. Finally the back up arrived, an officer I know. He asked what was going on. He got pissed at the recruit for accusing me of using cocaine. I finally was able to go home. I was sight sitting there on the side of the road, blood dripping down my face, red eyed, and next to a pool of vomit.

LESSON #2: The World is a Scary Place.
I had two conversations about the paranormal yesterday, when I woke up this morning, the backgammon set by the stairs was opened. I am attributing it to an encounter, I think I will play its game.

LESSON#3: The World maybe scary and funny, but nature is fair.
Last night after such a shitty day, I had the best dream I have had in a LONG TIME. I wish you could hook up a usb cable to your brain and put your dreams in a video. Seriously, I will not tempt the fates today to test out my good mood, but I will think of that dream when something goes wrong or pisses me off.

That is all for now.